Kotori spent a lot of time talking and just being beside Maat. Nikki understood that he likes a tribal scholar very much and it seems Maat doesn't mind his company, too. "It's only better.." - Nikki thought. -"Maybe it will help me forget him..." However, it wasn't easy to watch them and see how Kotori and Maat feel good just talking and laughing together, Nikki felt jealous if even she realized that she'll never change Maat.
But here was Tahatan, who believed in her and it helped and supported Nikki a lot. Although... It wasn't easy, too. Tahatan liked to laugh and tell jokes, but Nikki didn't have any sense of humour, so mostly she didn't understand him.
- Isn't it funny or I just said something wrong? - Tahatan looked at Nikki watching her face and trying to perceive even an attempt to smile.
- It's not funny and it's stupid, - Nikki mumbled shaking her head.
Of course, then he felt disappointed and she was looking at him with silly smile on her face feeling guilty and not knowing what to say.
Mostly anything Nikki said went wrong. She didn't know how to treat the tribal sons what knew their kind, were self-assured and didn't fear that they can be punished even for saying No to Amazon. Nikki wasn't nice, especially with men. She was used to forget that Tahatan will not obey her will, especially if she'll yell at him. But it was so normal in her native tribe when men always obeyed Amazons and feared to be punished. She saw the submissive slaves since her childhood and now everything has changed. When she yelled at Tahatan he also raised his voice reminding her that he's not a slave and if she'll not change her behavior she can forget him as her friend.
Tahatan's words reached her heart. Nikki didn't want to lose Tahatan as her friend. He was calm and subtle, supported her. Being with Tahatan Nikki didn't think of Kotori. Seeing how Tahatan feels offended Nikki felt bad. It was first time when she started to think of her behavior with men. She felt embarrassed and totally confused. Nikki realized that "I'm sorry" will not be enough, she has to change her view and behavior if she wants to live in the Blessing Moon tribe.
And when she felt bad and very sad solitude was her best friend. Nikki loved to be alone, but she understood that living together with people it's almost impossible. She appreciated her such moments when she could stay only with herself. And now she lay on yoga mat and tried to concentrate on her heart center, to get energy from nature. She prayed silently in her thoughts asking Nanina to give her more wisdom and find the right decision. Nikki didn't want to hurt anyone, especially Tahatan, but she always did. "I am not a bad person", - she talked in her mind. - "Anyone can't see my heart so clear as you, goddess Nanina. I just didn't know that this world will change and I'll have to change together with it. Strengthen me, oh, Nanina, and open my heart, lead me on the way I have to go, be my star in the night..."
Tears were running on Nikki's cheeks and fell like a dew on the grass. Suddenly Nikki felt a gentle wind. It felt like an invisible hand what touched her face and she could swear she heard the whisper in her ear: "- I am here, my daughter... Love.... Bring love to these people. It's the best way to fix your mistakes. You know what to do, my daughter."
Nikki opened her eyes and saw a raven flying over her. "Love... Bring love to these people"... - she repeated the words in her thoughts watching the raven."- I know... I know... I know!" - she rose to her feet.
- Thank you... - Nikki bowed respectfully still looking at the bird what landed on the branch of tree. - Yes, I know what to do.
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